Friday, November 7, 2014

Destructive Habits

10/27.

i pick at my scabs all the time
until i get blood underneath my fingernails
like a few days ago
when my nail ripped lower than it should have
because i didn't care enough
to cut them short
and i bite at the sides of my nails anyway
where there's just a little extra skin
and it hurts,
but i still do it
because i think too much
and focus too little on what i'm doing.

Fall Trees Falling

10/27.

the trees were changing colors
and they shut down a lane of traffic
to remove a bunch of them
from the side of the road
forcing us to slow down,
stop, go again, stop again
and watch them tear down
the earth's most beautiful painting
so they could burn it as firewood.
it's like they're destroying
the autumn
to prepare for
winter.

They Never Knew Me Anyway

10/22.

sometimes i worry
that i don't know my friends
anymore,
but they never really knew me
because we were never
truly friends.

Time Is Relative to Distance

10/22.

from a distance,
even cars move as slow
as the hands on a clock
and we move even slower,
even during rush hour
in new york city
so believe me when i say
that all this rushing
is for nothing
when time is only a concept
and it might as well
just stand still.

This One Was On You

10/22.

every friendship i've lost
was my own fault,
but ours was lost
because you cared more about her
than the girl that smiled with you
since kindergarten
and i didn't want you, no
but i loved you in a special way
and i guess
that didn't matter to you
because you threw me away
and i'm sure you're completely okay.

I Watched a Man Die

10/22.

i watched a man die
and he's still alive

and daddy,
maybe that's why
it's so hard to talk to you
these days.

I Give My Lungs Away

10/22.

when i give my heart to someone,
i give them my lungs, too
because i let them control my breathing
and every inhale -
every exhale
is theirs
and it only gets bad
when i get so upset
that i'm left gasping for air
until they promise that they're not going away
and that my lungs can stay
in place.